13 Reasons Why I'll Never Ask When You Plan to Start Your Family

This morning I grabbed my Dollar General mug. This mug carries no great significance, other than the fact it contains coffee, but was so cute sitting on the discount shelf that I had to snatch it up.

I've been testing out different brands and blends of coffee, in attempts to find one that only requires cream or sugar but not both at the same time. I still have a few pesky baby pounds to lose and with as much coffee as I consume, this should do the trick. Anyways, I'm drinking Seattle's Best No. 5 with just a little sugar and am really enjoying it. Their cinnamon blend will forever be my favorite but this will do.

My Love and I were married for just over six years before our perfect little man was born. In those six years I cannot count the times we were asked, in variable forms, "so, when will you start your family?" a question that brought me near tears on more than one occasion. There was a time when I wasn't sure we would ever be able to have a child. Not everyone publicizes their struggles, this does not mean that they don't exist.

 Here are 13 reasons why you will never hear me ask this question:

* The answer is simply none of my business.

* You have already started your family by getting married. The size of which is to be determined by you, your spouse, and God.

* Maybe you don't have the desire to have children, and there is absolutely nothing wrong with that.

* Maybe you are not able to have children.

* Maybe you and your spouse are having marital issues that you want to resolve before having a child

* Maybe you're saving to adopt

* Maybe you and your spouse have been trying, you're both perfectly fine, and it just hasn't happened yet

* Maybe you have not yet achieved personal goals that you desire to accomplish before becoming a parent

* Maybe you're scared

* Maybe you already have one child and have decided that he/she is enough

* Maybe you've tried every fertility drug out there and nothing has worked yet

* Maybe you've been pregnant and experienced loss

* Maybe non of this matters, because, as stated before, this is none of my business!


If you're a family member or a close enough friend to be 'framily' (hating myself for using that term but it's just so stinking catchy!) and feel you have some sort of right to ask, do everyone a favor and ask your questions privately and face to face.

Maybe the question that we should all ask a lot more often is "how can I pray for you?"