In constant pursuit of coffee and Christ

Saturday, September 20, 2014

9 Things I Wish Were True of Myself

Today's mug choice was an easy one. Ben always brings back a surprise when he travels, this round produced a coffee mug, my new favorite.

Siren by Starbucks 
Our routine when Ben flies out is simple: arrive at least an hour early, grab coffee, hang out and wait for flight to take off. Nothing special but having this time is essential to my sanity while he is away.

I am always picking up and oogling over coffee mugs and accessories while we are in the shop. I had picked up this gem and gave it an approving nod while we waited for my Cinnamon Dolce Late and his Double Barrel Late and didn't think he'd noticed. We hadn't even pulled away from passenger pick up when he handed me a bag containing my new mug and a 75% dark chocolate bar. He remembered, after being gone for a week, and gave me chocolate.

Whether your husband travels for military, recreation, or business, if you're like me, having our guys away is never a fun time.

Here are the nine things I tell myself every time we're preparing for him to leave, that I wish were true. 

1. The house will be in perfect order when we leave for the airport

Rarely is this the case, and in all honesty, is almost always quite the opposite. The last thing I want to do in the day(s) before he leaves is spend our family time cleaning/doing yard work. All those things can be taken care of while he is away and I am by myself while our boy is asleep. 

That pile of laundry - it can wait
Those dirty dishes - they will be there tomorrow

2. I won't be grouchy

Maybe it's just me but preparing for my husband to be away for more than a day is far from my favorite thing. Will we survive, yes. Will I be happy about it, no. 

3. I'll conduct myself as the "perfect military wife" 

You know, gracefully floating through the air with my hair perfectly done, in a classy dress, arm in arm with my SeaBee, while our son showers him in hugs and kisses; no evil look will phase me, disrespect at TSA will be brushed off my shoulders, and everyone will read my demeanor as "she's got her act together".

How things really went down: I wore a tee shirt and jeans, my hair up in one of my worst attempts at a cute messy bun, because our son is a grouchy, teething, mommy-clinging mess and I had to rush to get ready. I did walk arm in arm with my man, while our son showered both of us in drool or cried because he was in his stroller (how dare we not let him run amuck through the airport, putting his mouth on everything and everyone... I HATE teething!). 

The judgmental glances of onlookers bothers me, to the point where I would love to go over and smack it right off their faces. Babies cry, they make messes - get over it! The TSA agent who waved my husband through the gate then watched, disapprovingly, as I struggled to take my shoes off (I shouldn't have had to), and place the stroller, diaper bag, shoes, and baby toys that fell from my bag, into buckets and onto the conveyor. During which time the other TSA agent repeatedly told me to remove all liquids from my bag (not my first go around buddy, I didn't bring any liquids!) and did all but step directly in front of me while repeating that sentence over and over. They deserved a good smack too. 

Nobody was thinking I had my act together, because I most certainly did not. 

4. I won't choke up when he kisses me and our son goodbye

I do. Every time.

5. I won't wait until the plane takes off to leave the terminal

I stand there, or in this case walk in circles pushing my fussy boy in his stroller praying he doesn't start screaming because I just may join him, and wait to see the plane move away from the gate. There is no way I want to be on our way home should his flight become delayed after boarding. This has already happened once and we lost over two extra hours. Never again. 

6. Things around the world are not as bad as the media makes them out to be and he will be perfectly safe

They are, if not worse, and I am not a fan. 

7. I will confidently enter my house and go on as if he were simply in another room

What really happens: I slowly pull up to our house, watching carefully for any sign that we have been tampered with. I park and lock the doors, watching in the windows for flashlights, movement, anything that is not as it should be.

*I just wrote, and quickly erased my system but, trust me, there is one and it is extensive. Let's leave it at when I say we are locked down, I mean it. 

8. I will not check to make sure we are locked and secure 3+ times before being able to fall asleep

I will. I just will. 

9. I will not fall asleep running my emergency plan through my brain

There are alternate versions of this plan but it always ends the same: Do not let them reach the baby

I'm so grateful to have been brought up memorizing scripture. Here are some of my absolute favorites, especially when home alone.

"For God has not given us a spirit of fear, but of power, love, and a sound mind."
~ 2 Timothy 1:7

"A thousand may fall at your side, ten thousand at your right hand, but it will not come near you."
~ Psalm 91:7 

Thursday, September 11, 2014

It Is Time, a 13th Anniversary Reflection

photo taken from

As I sit here this morning, sipping my coffee and reflecting on everything going on in the world, I am saddened and almost feel guilty that my precious son will have to pay for the mistakes of a past generation. That is, if the current one doesn't get their heads screwed on straight and demand America to be what she was intended for: equality, opportunity (notice not equal opportunity - you get what you work for), growth as individuals and as a nation brought together by one commonality, the desire for freedom to live and believe however we chose - without consequence.

It's time to throw political party aside and come together because we want what is best for our country and the brave men and women who defend her.

It's time to worry less about if your neighbor goes to church or not and focus on simply being a good neighbor.

It's time to stop the "it's all about me", "I do what I want", and "who asked you" mindset and look for ways we can be helpful to one another, to be willing to take direction from someone who's already driven the road, and take constructive criticism without harboring offense.

It's time to respect each others decisions and stop trying to tell everyone how we feel they should live their lives. How about we focus on living our own lives, and living them well. Then, if someone likes what they see in us, and they want it too, they will be more willing to hear what we have to say.

It's time to take pride in our nation again, pride in ourselves, and pride in what we accomplish for ourselves and for our children. Not in a gloating manner, but rather as motivation. Motivation to be better the next time, motivation to create the best world possible for the future generation.

It's time to take responsibility for our own lives and stop waiting for a 'miracle' or, the government or, a job to turn our lives into what we've always wanted. WE control our destiny.

It's time to take responsibility for our own nation and stop waiting for a 'miracle' or the government to do their jobs and turn our land into what it once was and was always meant to be. WE control our children's future nation.  WE can make this great nation the greatest it's ever been.

Of course, this is all just my opinion, and you have the freedom to disagree :-)